JOY PART 3

Last week I gave the class a paper to list 10 ways they give joy to others.  I know.  I know.  It is hard to “toot” your own horn.  Everyone quickly agreed that we receive great joy when helping others.  I believe this is true, but, if you want to test this theory so you can feel great joy, I really like good cheesecake.

Quickly, the list began.  Listen was the first, followed by greet people, smile and pray.  One lady said she could see joy on the face of a fellow teacher, when she handed them their favorite drink.  A simple gift!  Others feel joy when they are given a compliment or when they are on the receiving end of a common courtesy.  (Forget being politically correct!  Tell someone when they look particularly fetching or they are wearing a pretty pair of ear rings or are wearing a funky tie.  Open doors for others.)

Bring joy by keeping in touch.  Try writing an actual letter that goes into an envelope and requires a stamp.  Think of their joy as they receive something other than bills and junk mail.  When someone is not expecting it, call or text them.  A quick “good morning” may be just the thing they need to start their day. 

TIME!  Time is one of the most important things you can give your loved ones and friends.  Sit down to a meal and turn the phone off.  Enjoy playing a game or working a puzzle.  What joy they will feel knowing they are important enough for you to spend your valuable time with them.

Giving others joy means you will hear the slightest thing they say.  Did they mention they once wanted to learn how to knit?  Would they like to know how you make those really good brownies?  Give them the joy of learning a new skill.  It was pointed out that, even though they might want to knit, they might not be able to knit.  (Remember, we all have different talents, but what a joy it will be to spend time trying.)

Everyone agreed with laughter.  What joy it is to laugh!!  And did our class ever laugh.  One person said the church would bring her great joy if the toilet paper in the ladies room was good, two ply paper.  No, I am not going into details.  Yes, it was Carla. 

Finally, regaining control, I asked, “Is it hard to allow others to help you?”  The comments came:

• It is hard to admit I need help.
• But, I feel joy when my kids ask me to help them.
• I do not want to be a bother.
• I feel joy helping others, especially when I can do it without being asked.

Others help with random acts of kindness and talking to strangers.  Talking to strangers opens our eyes and hearts to the way others live.  We hear their stories.  One person said they asked someone how they were.  They replied, “Better than I deserve to be.” 

Sadly, sometimes fear keeps us away from helping others, as does refusing to get out of our comfort zone.  COVID has made us think out of the box and find new ways to bring joy to others. 

One of the final comments was to forgive.  What joy forgiveness brings.

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I have thought a lot about our discussion on how to bring joy to others.  It would be easy to end with forgiveness, but there are two things which can impact those closest to you and extend into impacting the world.

LISTEN – six letters.  Listen sounds simple.  We all think we listen.  We listen to our friends while checking the messages on our phone or sending a quick text.  We listen to our family as we continue to read or watch TV.  What if we use a shorter word:  HEAR.  It is only four letters, but changes the whole situation.  Hear:

• listen or pay attention to
• to gain knowledge
• to listen to with attention

How would the joy level of those around you change if you did not look at your phone/iPad/?? while they were talking to you?  How would your friends react if you actually heard what they were saying?  How would your family feel when they realize you are making them number one?  Too often we are formulating a reply or a defense, instead of hearing what the other person is saying.  And, yes, I am very guilty of that.  But, once we learn the difference between listening and hearing, we will learn that we are more alike than different.  And the areas where we are different can grow smaller when we hear each other.

TIME – four letters.  Ah, but time is valuable.  Time is precious.  Which leads to the question:  How do you spend your time?  I would love to say, “I spend my time doing very worthwhile things.  I …..”  The truth is I waste a whole lot of time.  I post on Facebook and Instagram.  I love to play a slots game on my iPad.  So you do not get the wrong impression, I spend time with my hubby, write letters to grandsons + five others in the military, volunteer with a kindergarten class of home schoolers, prepare Sunday School lessons, and manage the church Facebook and website.  I am not telling you this to make myself look good.  It is to point out how quickly our time is consumed.

Time is valuable.  Time is precious.  What joy others will feel knowing they are important enough for you to spend your valuable time with them.

How do you give joy to others?  Listen, but listen with attention and hear.  Hear your family, your friends, and those strangers.  Give of your time.  Make others feel special and valuable.  It might take a whole evening of playing games or it might just take a second to give a person the only smile they have seen all day.