WHAT LIMITS YOU?

I think I have mentioned that I am part of a monthly discussion group.  After this month’s meeting, I told the ladies, “I think this will end up as a blog.”  They replied, “We want credit.”  Contributing to the discussion were Louise, Maribeth, Patty, Rita and Sarah. 

The discussion began with a simple question:  What stops us or limits us from achieving our goals?  I am going to try and condense a three hour, on topic discussion.  Hey, we are women.  Would you honestly expect a short discussion? 

NEGATIVE COMMENTS:  Yes, an obvious place to begin.  A negative comment can stop us in our tracks.  We instantly begin to doubt our ability, our chance of reaching our goal, or if we have the right to achieve them.  A negative comment is very loud even if whispered in our ear.  You cannot do that.  You will never succeed.  You are not smart enough.  That has already been done.  You are not worth investing my time or money in.

But, can a negative comment have a positive affect?  Have you ever dug your heals in when someone told you, “You can’t do that.  You will fail.”  Has your reply ever been, “I will show them!”  Sometimes a negative comment can be the exact motivation we need. 

POSITIVE COMMENTS:  Positive comments are priceless!  How encouraging to hear the words, “I am so proud of you.  You are working so hard to achieve your goal.”  Four words can change a person’s outlook:  I believe in you.

But, can a positive comment have a negative affect?  Encouragement must be honest.  There are many goals we will never reach, not because we do not want to, but because we do not have the ability.  Someone may constantly say, “You can do this.  Don’t let anything stand in your way.”  Misdirected encouragement may cause a person to chase the wrong goal.

You thought this was going to be a fluff piece didn’t you?  We are a discussion group and, with varied backgrounds, our discussions come from six points of view.  Moving on ….

RESPONSIBILITIES / PRIORITIES:  Our goals may begin to take shape when we are very young, but further education, marriage, having children, and career moves can place our goals on hold or they are replaced with new goals.  Health can deteriorate.  Finances are diverted or not there at all.  Life happens and we have responsibilities and must set priorities.

OLD VALUES / OLD PREJUDICES:  Sadly, old values and old prejudices continue to place limitations on way too many people.  AGE:  We can be too young to be taken seriously because we lack experience or too old and considered obsolete.  Age should no longer be a barrier.  Young minds are minds which have not been placed in a box and can lead us into the future.  Old minds contain wisdom and knowledge that still has value and worth.  Combining ages, instead of separating them, allows growth where goals can receive direction and succeed because of innovation.  SEX:  The glass ceiling has not been broken.  Women are still discriminated against in business and further education.  Men may be promoted because they are not considered the care-giver to their children.  This means women are often held back because they will need time to “be there” when children are ill or have school functions.  Men may be given better educational opportunities so women can fill “traditional roles.”  SKIN COLOR/NATIONALITY:  In 2023, this should not even be an issue and should not be used to limit the goals people want to achieve.  Likewise, these should not be used to gain an advantage over others.  I fear, until the political agenda changes, the use of skin color or nationality will continue to cause division in all areas of education and employment.  This division impacts life and the ability to reach goals.

LISTENING:  The final comment is about listening.  Learn to listen to the right voices.  Listen to the voices that are truthful about your ability to reach your goals.  Find a person to hold you accountable and then listen to their advice.  Listen with an open mind and be willing to adjust your goals.  Mainly, listen to your inner voice:  The Holy Spirit.

As believers, the Holy Spirit is a permanent part of our lives and will guide us in the way we should go.  Listen closely to that voice!!

THE FINAL QUESTION:  What do you allow to stop you from reaching your goals?