MANNERS

When I absolutely cannot think of something to write, I open Etiquette,  by Emily Post.  As I look through the book, I realize I would never – that is NEVER – be invited to a formal dinner.  I do not have attire for between the hours of one and six.  Known as important day dresses.  I do not own a hat and my gloves seem to be misplaced.  I might be invited to a “frumpy party.”  What is a frumpy party?  It is a collection of badly dressed persons.  Not even the most beautiful background could in itself suggest a brilliant gathering if the majority of those present were frumps – or vulgarians! 

I could never be the hostess for a formal dinner.  Our silverware stops after the knife, spoon, fork, and dessert/salad fork.  I have no bouillon cups and saucers.  Nor fingerbowls.  If I hosted a formal dinner, society would move me to the frumpy party list the very next day.

Oh well.  At least I know a few etiquette rules. 

• I do not put my left arm around the plate while eating with the right hand. 
• I do not put liquid into my mouth if I have already taken a bite of food.
• I do not dunk food unless I am in a lunch wagon.

I might break a few of the rules.

• My elbows seem to enjoy being on the table.
• I eat a chicken leg with my fingers.
• I have been known to lean back and say, “I’m through.”
• And that pesky napkin refuses to stay on my lap.

After this, Jesus went out and saw a tax collector by the name of Levi sitting at his tax booth. “Follow me,” Jesus said to him,  and Levi got up, left everything and followed him.

Then Levi held a great banquet for Jesus at his house, and a large crowd of tax collectors and others were eating with them. But the Pharisees and the teachers of the law who belonged to their sect complained to his disciples, “Why do you eat and drink with tax collectors and sinners?”

Jesus answered them, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick.  I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.”     Luke:5:27-32

Now I would fit right in the banquet Levi threw.  Bon appétit